A Rose by Nearly Any Other Name

Sometimes I do meet someone and think to myself, “Huh, you don’t seem like a Jenny.” So, there certainly is a point to Roy Feinson’s assertion that we make assumptions about who the person we’re going to meet is based on their name, and even, perhaps how we may carry out our lives based on our own names. But… how can you say that Ella is going to be happier in love than Edda?

Well, the Secret Universe of Names: The Dynamic Interplay of Names and Destiny, not only makes that determination, but many more. There are strong names, soft names, masculine names, and feminine ones. I guess that makes sense. But often there are family names. Does your daughter remind you of your mother because of her nose… or her name?

So, I checked out my name – the only thing to do, right? Reading about what an ADR person is was just like reading a horoscope. A big ‘well maybe.’ Interestingly some other people’s names I came across were very like their personality! So, I began to get drawn in by Feinson’s study and writing (not the spelling errors, though) and wondered if I was perhaps missing out on some of the benefits of being called Adrian. (Specifically my supposed main attributes: charismatic, sexy, admirable – think Audrey Hepburn…)

Speaking of Audrey Hepburn, there are nice little boxes at the base of each page giving a real-life example of how each type of name has been embodied the way that Feinson discovered it would. ADR has a tiny biography of Audrey. Although ADRs apparently should be able to take on most any profession with success, a movie actor makes a good example. But on the opposite page ADM also has a movie actor for its good example of that character. So I turn the page in either direction and discover that ADL and AG also have biographies of movie actors. After a few pages I find ALBRT, which is pretty much the whole name anyhow. Guess who? Yep, Albert Einstein is there to explain how ALBRT is one of the top names available for anyone – even working for one of Canada’s central provinces to this day.

So, this was fun, but also stupid. I am convinced that naming a kid Piscine might get him into trouble, but less because it’s a ‘paternal and benign’ letter ‘P’ starting it off than the fact that dear Piscine from the Life of Pi had a difficult time getting anyone to say anything better than pissing when talking to him.